i wish i could say i love you. i do. but undoubtedly you have dealt blow after blow since the 1st. you have delivered bad news on top of bad news, ultimately trying and breaking my optimistic outlook.
with that said, you have taught me something new. you have taught me to deeper search for wonderful things, as little and petty as they may be, and see their meaning. with those tiny little beautiful things i have decided to pile them up and hold on to them; count them; adore them and keep them so the next time you approach with a new complication in hand, i'll fall on things i love.
i don't blame you for being honest.
but instead of caving to your news, i've decided to welcome it.
find humor in it. and approach it on a case by case basis, as hard as this may be.
beacuse you have affected the people i love most, this month, i have also decided to be about everyone else. i'll check in every now and then, but my empathy is on reserve for the people i love. so i can laugh with them. cry with them. bring a bit of light in their darkness. hug them. escape with them. and just be present.
so, that's what i will be doing from now on. i may also accompany my plan of attack with chocolate. maybe some wine. but guaranteed, with laughter. not for you, but for my loved ones because they need it most right now.
suck it december.