a date with myself

i have wanted to have a little solo date for a few weekends now but could never find the right time to do it. i'm not one to miss out on a gathering with friends or family and at the same time i stink at setting aside time for myself. my time is split in so many directions that i typically feel bad if i am not devoting it to mila or jay or our two attention deprived cats, so my time for me is never really a priority. recently jay asked me when the last time i had gotten out was, just me, and i think, i think, it was to the grocery store run last week. sad right? i have been feeling a bit boxed in lately too. not by the weather but by the routines i try to stick to with mila, or the goals i have set to get outside every day now that the weather is a bit warmer. the "now we eat...now we play...now we sleep..." on repeat all day every day is starting to drive me a bit nuts. and then i feel bad for feeling bad. that's what mom's do right? feel crazy, then feel bad, then feel like we are going to be better and repeat. please tell me i'm not alone in thinking this.

yesterday i made sure my solo date would happen. it wasn't the most convenient time i'll admit. we had jay's brother and girlfriend over for brunch to watch the canadian olympic hockey game and right after eating i jetted out, not watching the rest of the game and leaving everyone at home. i didn't feel too bad because they would be coming over later in the day so at least i knew i could properly hang out then.

i started by getting a mani/pedi and to my surprise i wasn't walking down the street thinking "i wonder {insert just about anything} about mila..." {which i felt bad about later, ugh this mom guilt!} but i tried to focus on being in the moment, freezing, and not checking my phone once while i was out. lucky for me, my battery died so the phone checking part wasn't that hard. i ended my date with a spontaneous trip to the the wedding cake shoppe on college street which has the most amazing cupcakes! and because i have decided to give up chocolate for a year {more on that later} i grabbed a dulce cupcake to go and ate it at home while jay was tending to mila.

thanks again handsome for letting me finish my solo date barefoot, cozy and somewhat in a quiet space. 

in the kitchen

it is a 2014 goal of mine to cook more at home in hopes of learning quick, easy, go to meals that can be fun for kiddos later on. between jay and myself, jay has always been the master chef. he comes from a family of amazing cooks who turn out a five star family dinner like it was nothing. my version of an incredible dinner usually consisted of peeling a potato, that meant effort. after years of feeling inspired by jay's family, and then relinquishing any hope of getting to their level of expertise, and then feeling inspired again, and then copying their recipes one by one, burning some and succeeding at others, i decided it was time to figure out this home cooking for myself. intro, homemade pizza!

i decided to start with pizza because when jay and i first started dating we (more he) would make pizza on special date nights which always seemed like a treat. he made the dough and i would usually grate cheese and sous chef whatever else we were putting on it. i also worked in a pizza shop as a teenager and hoped some long lost experience there would help me out. so far, it's going pretty great! we have had pizza about once a week at this point because i am so proud of my new found ability. eventually we will need to curve this healthier options, but for now pizza once a week is pretty great in my books. especially because i can confidently make dough rise on the first try. this was no small feat in itself, let me tell you.

you can find the dough recipe i used here on epicurious. i like to add some basil and garlic to the dry mixture for a little something extra. if you like pizza (and who doesn't really?) then for sure give it a go! it's easy, it's fun and oddly therapeutic when you get to it. 

around these parts

we have had a lot of inside time lately. a lot. this polar vortex keeps stopping by for a visit making our temperatures -20c most days (or -4 for our fahrenheit friends). plus with wind chill warnings i'm not too interested in taking m out for a little afternoon stroll most days. even if she is toasty and warm and covered up in her stroller i would still need to lug our stroller down our narrow staircase, baby in arms, and struggle opening and attaching everything one handed. it's just not worth it when you know what kind of weather is going to greet you on the other side.

instead, we have suckered up extra pajama time, more books, new music and daily laughs which have become a regular occurrence for m. it makes this mama's heart melt every single time she laughs but especially when we laugh together. while cabin fever hasn't set in, i do still find myself dreaming of sunny days again. jay and i have talked about where we want to travel to next and i find myself spouting off a few warm weather places before anywhere else first. seems my subconscious is sneaking sunny thoughts. for now, we are hanging snug at home while my self inflicted "stroller bruises" are on reserve for warmer days.

photos from the phone

On mamahood :: month four

here we are, month four! this little lady is figuring out more and more each day and it's been pretty fun to watch her piece it all together. she is fully refusing sleep at all costs now. naps, bedtime...it doesn't matter. what happened to that awesome sleeper of ours?! no seriously what happened because the nine hour uninterrupted stretch was amazing. someone please tell me good sleep comes back. it does right? good.

 LAAV on mamahood pt. two at four months:

• she rolled over! 
• i've made myself sick and lightheaded doing stupid things to get her to laugh. even if it's just a giggle.
• jay makes her laugh way more then I can. 
• her hair is growing in except for that one bald spot on the back. that seems to be losing more hair. 
• just when i think i have this parenting thing figured out,  i'm reminded i so totally do not. 
• i love how everything is so new and exciting to her. 
• those dreaded baby nail clippers...terrifying.  
• not sure if she thinks we have two cats or just one super mysterious one. 
• my arms are sore from lifting her up to see the the bins at the top of the refrigerator but her smile when i do it is so worth it. 
• we can't wait to start traveling with her. can't wait!

a little trip to the aquarium

these past few days we have been enjoying some family time with my dad and stepmom who are visiting from costa rica. we decided to take a little trip to the ripley's aquarium here in toronto which i have been wanting to go to so bad since first hearing about it. we spent hours there and if you couldn't tell from my instagram feed yesterday i was pretty excited to be there. i mean shark tunnel, really. and the jellyfish wall, seriously. i could sit in front of that for hours. we actually went back to sit there for a second time. we also may have ended the day with two new memberships. 

hope you enjoy our little film from our adventures that day!

that time she had really blonde hair, he rarely cut his hair and they both lived in L.A.

jay and i got m down with no fuss (no fuss!) the other night and took the free time to go through our photos from europe. we have been meaning to print some off for awhile now to hang in some gallery frames jay got me for our anniversary. right before we shut the computer down for the night we ended up finding a folder full of photos from the years we lived in los angeles. we met there so the city holds a special place in my heart. not to mention we have some really dear friends who still live there.

these photos brought back so many wonderful memories and made me miss our times together back then. though, i wouldn't trade what we have at this moment for the world, it's sweet to look back and remember what brought us to where we are. i will admit i desperately miss my ability to tan as well as i used to. but apparently my love for old man caps remains the same and i'm pretty happy about that.

{2006: new years eve at 26 beach restaurant in venice. i used to work there too!}

{2005: santa ynez wine country with the bestie and big sister. some photos from this trip may never be seen again}

{2005: ice skating in downtown. hence the short sleeves but i really tried to get the look with the scarf, can't you tell?}

{not sure the date here, i think 2004, but this is the cafe where we met! it's moved since but still around if you ever want to go. the talking stick, started by our friends rich and sheri. rich ended up marrying us and sheri was one of my bridesmaids}

{2005: at a petting zoo in a pumpkin patch. you can't see it but i am rocking a wool vest along with that cap and hideous bag}

 { 2005: the fourth of july fireworks with friends on the field of my college in santa monica. also one of my most favourite photos of us}